I suppose everyone in the States who cares about such things saw the Rio 2016 Opening Ceremonies via tape delay tonight.

It appears to have been the usual four hours of mind-numbing singing and dancing and people whirling in bright colors, including two hours of the Parade of Nations (anyone else old enough to remember when this was a dignified exercise and not some jostling selfie-fest goof?) … and well, here is a British sports writer doing a nice job describing what went on.

I attempted to watch the ceremonies live, starting at 1 a.m. in France, but I passed out just before it started and by the time I came around, that weasel IOC president Thomas Bach — does he remind anyone else of Sepp Blatter? — was giving a speech no one cared about, and the ceremonies were nearly over.

However, I had tuned in early enough to see the end of the Olympic torch relay, and the lighting of the cauldron by someone other than Brazil’s most famous athlete — and perhaps most famous person.

Which would be Edson Arantes do Nascimento — that is, the soccer great Pele. Who pretty much had to light the cauldron for Brazil’s Games, didn’t he? But who told organizers he was not available just a few hours before the Opening began.

And the explanation?

Pele, 75, said (apparently through his agent) that he was not up to traveling to the Maracana Stadium to touch the Olympic flame to the cauldron.

Which leaves me thinking we do not yet have all the facts to this story — which may be as interesting as the rest of the ceremonies.

Pele was quoted as saying: “I’m not in physical condition to take part in the opening ceremony …

“Only God is more important than my health. In my life, I’ve had fractures, surgeries, pain, hospital stays, victories and defeats. And I’ve always respected those who admire me.”

Well, that is a bit elliptical.

He said not participating was his “own decision”.

His spokesman added: “He is walking with a cane. The problem is that if he sits in a chair you need a winch to get him out of it.”

Other sources suggested Pele’s most pressing problem is recovering from hip-replacement surgery and is in pain when he moves. In recent years he also has had a urinary tract infection and had prostate surgery.

The thing is, if you lasted till the end of the Opening Ceremonies, you saw the former marathoner Vanderlei Cordero de Lima handle the duties that apparently would have been Pele’s, and if memory serves, the stand-in took the Olympic torch from a basketball player and went up a short flight of steps and put it on the cauldron — and that was it.

Pele would not have needed to walk at all. He could have been wheeled lifted to the cauldron level moments before the torch arrived. In theory, the crowd would have erupted when they saw who was waiting to do the deed.

It’s not like he was expected to dribble a ball the length of the Maracana.

Muhammad Ali, remember, was trembling violently when he touched the flame to the device that lit the cauldron at Atlanta 1996. He had been helped to a spot above the stadium, where no climbing was necessary … and could not Pele have managed that?

Some other considerations:

–The Opening Ceremonies director, a film guy, told reporters today that he had hoped for a environmental activist to light the cauldron. Did Pele get wind of that and become offended?

–Is athlete vanity involved? Perhaps Pele does not want people to remember him with limited mobility, as opposed to the mercurial player who led Brazil to three World Cup championships.

–Could politics be involved? Brazil is deeply divided between left and right, and Pele apparently offended many in the country in 2013 when he criticized protesters of the government. Maybe the man in the street didn’t want him around the Olympics, and maybe Pele knows that.

Still.

The man who lit the cauldron, Vanderlei de Lima, has an interesting Olympics story — he was leading the marathon at Athens 2004 when a nutty defrocked Irish priest pushed him off the road, perhaps costing the Brazilian runner a gold. He got silver, instead.

But he is no Pele. No one in Brazil is. No athlete anywhere — though Cristiano Ronaldo may get there yet — is so instantly identified with his home country than is Pele. And some significant fraction of humans alive today recognize his name as the Brazilian who probably was the greatest soccer player.

He had to light the flame, at the most dramatic moment of the ceremonies, but he wasn’t there — even when the job could have been light work.

Either Pele is in worse condition that we have been led to believe, or he got huffy at how organizers treated him.

I’d like to know, just because I am curious.